Drink deep of my sorrow as I entertain you with tales of Japanese Animated debauchery.


Read more: http://www.blogdoctor.me/2008/03/free-css-navigation-menus-in-blogger.html#ixzz124kU3bQe

Friday, August 27, 2010

Back in the saddle. Of sorts.

http://tekyu.com/

That's the mirror of this blog as it stands. I typically post HERE on blogger first and slap stuff on the dotcom next. Think of it as a filter.

Anyway, it's just another way of worshiping Tekyu, so on your knees, worms!



I don't know why I posted Ranma, but... here's more Ranma!

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Anime Nerds: Success and Vengeance, er-I mean, Failure.

Some nerds are created more equal than others. Some are excitable (and occasionally attractive) cosplayers, others are nerds who put together small businesses turning what they love into a job and some nerds are the power behind companies that they run into the ground after 20 or so years of booming success preying on the wallets of other nerds. No matter the path, Nerding used as an instrument of passion can shake the very earth.

Let's jam about some ways to be a part of the anime industry, yo!


Monday, August 23, 2010

Gunsmith Cats/Riding Bean: The Fast and the Flirtatious

I get memos on occasion.

In this instance, I got the memo that the adult, gritty manga story that I'd been hooked on was going to be put into anime form and my face lit up like a thousand suns.

In the end, that's not quite what happened as anime was certainly made, but nothing like anyone reading the comic would have expected.

Let's draw a bead on the anime mishap that makes me sad on the inside AND the outside, Gunsmith Cats.


Sunday, August 22, 2010

Fight! Iczer-1: Tentacles threaten Earth, Lesbians our only hope!

Drunk on confidence since I've made it through three consecutive favorites, I feel it's a nice break for us all to follow up an Utena review with another lesbian treat.

It's a science fiction FACT, Maser Cannons are no replacement for lesbians. Their powers defy physics and logic as they overcome plot holes and common sense.

Such is a case with an old anime favorite of mine, Fight! Iczer-1!


Ping-Pong Club: "Protruding Pecker Serve", need I say more?

Adolescence is a delicate time for developing teens. So much fear about the future and so many new and interesting changes are happening in your life that it's almost overwhelming.

And then a drunk teacher puts on a strip show and shoves a carrot in your ass.

Such is the case with my #8 favorite anime, Ping Pong Club!


Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Yu Yu Hakusho: Screw excorcism, just punch 'em in the face!

So after persistent, puerile procrastination. I am ready. I am here.

It is time. The seventh time, to be specific.

Let's punch some eccentric demons right in junk as we square off against my #7 favorite anime: Yu Yu Hakusho!


Patlabor: Commit Labor Crimes, Do Labor... times?

Being pulled over by a cop is awkward, having your car stomped by a cop's giant robot is much harder to explain to your boss when you can't come in to work.

Believe me, I tried.


...Several times.


Arrest your interest as I get up off my dead ass and we FINALLY interrogate my #6 favorite anime of all time...


Patlabor!


Monday, August 16, 2010

Revolutionary Girl Utena: Sexual Ambiguity at its finest!




BRACE YER HINDERS!

Sometimes there's failure to establish a premise, and other times you wonder if you're HIGH OFF YOUR ASS.

Oh God, THE COLORSSSSSSSSSSSS...

Also gay. Homosexuality and sexual ambiguity are themes that pop up seemingly at random in anime in general, but some series sexuality almost defines a series and with some they combine the homosexuality and ambiguity into a big ball of mind fuck.

Speaking of which, let's discuss Revolutionary Girl Utena!


"If by 'asshole' you mean dual-wielding nunchuk Abraham Lincoln, then I concur."

Look at me! I'm deviating!!!

Let's pretend I'm not slacking on parts 6-10 and dabble in some Unforgotten realms.


Sunday, August 15, 2010

How do I buy this stuff??


(Japanese stuff meshes magnificently with American industry. Cars, eletronics, Rangers of every color! Why should anime be an exception?! Why not buy it on your terms?)


So anime series, OAVs and Movies come in plentiful amounts, especially long lived franchises and lengthy TV series. So let's be honest, that can get expensive, right? When I got seriously into anime (like... '93-'94?), I sought guidance from an old, lonely, marginally crazed man with fifty cats and a house full of anime laserdiscs and palpable regret.

I should have just taken a page from Ranma's book and swam to Japan.

Not to say that he didn't have plenty of info to share and his insight into anime, the market, voice acting, etc. made him a surprising asset to my overall understanding of the industry right as it began flooding over in tides of speedlines during the 90's. I should have written more back then, but I was an angsty child who could naught but pine for a Laserdisc player because they were obviously like touching the future itself.

Heh. Laserdiscs.

So now that I have more DVDs (anime and otherwise) than I can appropriately store and/or display, I feel it's only fair that I share some of my experience with future Otaku so that they too can writhe appropriately when they too hear that stupid word.

So with FAR less cats in tow, roughly 20 years of scraping for anime swag and experience and with current tools you can simply buy and click with, I gift you with the tools to become as big a nerd as myself with an anime collection so ample that the Gods of Nerding would themselves weep with pride at the very sight of it all, particularly since you've acquired on a budget of nothing.

With all that out of the way, let's talk preference and strategy. Since we're in a depression in the USA, anime is thick on the ground and companies are going under left right and sideways leaving their assets to be distributed by smarmy liquidators who drive the price and value down to nothing. It's AWESOME.

New Series

The newest series are the biggest pain. They always have been. As new episodes come over from Japan, they get processed in dub form, marketed and then distributed. So if you're picking everything up at Beast Buy, Fry's Electronics, Suncoast or whatever, you'll have to show up regularly and pick up each individual disc as it's released and usually you'll only have 2-4 episodes on the disc.

Doing this keeps you on top of the series, but this also leaves you with an assload of DVD cases floating around when it comes time to finish the series and months later you'll see boxed sets in the place of those same DVDs, usually for much less than you'd have paid for buying them new. And again, I have to stress the space that they'll consume, we're talking feet versus inches.

On the plus side though, you'll occasionally come across Third Party DVD boxes meant to contain ALL the DVDs released thus far. I picked up one for Evangelion as well as Bubblegum Crisis Tokyo 2040. I paid through the nose and I really could have just been patient and picked up the better and BETTERER versions of the series, but at least I was able to buy boxes that made it look like I'd planned this all in advance.

Check Rightstuf.com for artboxes periodically as well as eBay. You might surprise yourself.

Package Deals

Boxed sets are great ways to go. You get completion. You get closure. That's worth a lot. On their own you'll look at them as pricey, and so you should as they're usually STILL way overpriced. But if it's something you like and you've patiently waited for the distributor to put it together instead of blowing $10-$25 on each individual DVD then you get to enjoy the benefit of fixed glitches (like with Evangelion), impressive artboxes to decorate your nerd cave and most importantly SPACE for more anime as your collection grows.

On the more shallow end of logic the boxes usually look awesome and lately come in slim-packs that take up surprisingly little space.

Used

An option I can't recommend enough. Check out Pawn stores, Book stores, Comic shops, Amazon, FYE and the back of Suncoast stores for their used stuff. Ebay's alright too... sometimes.

Sure, you run the risk of getting a scratched or less-than-perfect disc, but you can save yourself hundreds of dollars building an anime collection this way. Gotta have money for swag, right? Shop smart! SHOP INTER...net...mart...thing. Stuff. Whatever.

The cheapest parts are individual DVDs and I know I just recommended against getting those, but I bend the rule when the collection of individual discs in a series can be acquired for a buck apiece.


Bootleg

I need to mention this because it needs to be mentioned. Bootlegs exist and I won't pretend they don't and they usually fulfill all kinds of needs by looking good, being cheap and taking up less space than anything the domestic distributor can afford to manufacture and sell. The bootleg also has the advantage of including everything the domestic distributor has paid good money to produce so far including an English dub and all the extras they've produced.

I've had some experience comparing the domestic and the bootleg items and here's what you can expect: Usually, the quality is VERY good visually and audibly, but to keep costs down they use inferior DVD discs, which will occasionally crap out. I had a Hellsing TV series set that totally died on me after about 4 uses.

When things really go bad, you'll notice. Sometimes they utilize compression methods to keep more episodes on one disc which can make the show look horrible. My bootleg Revoutionary Girl Utena set frequently has weird visual ticks and never shows the crisp clarity of the CPM domestic DVDs. Hiccups, glitches, skipping... all the typical Bootleg gripes, but it DOES work and it is the complete series.

While I can't blame anyone for going Bootlegs because it's a cheap, attractive and tangile alternative, one needs to brace themselves for any and all consequences that such decisions merit. For fear of earning distributor ire (or potentially sending angry distributors towards dealers who I bear no malice), I will simply say that those interested in obtaining these should explore the internet. You WILL find it.


Anime Downloads: Legal & Not so Legal


So many distributors clued in as to how smart it would be to take advantage of fair pricing and convenient downloading of anime episodes after a piecemeal fashion, so much so that aside from iTunes, you can download as much as your console hard drives can handle on your Xbox 360 and PS3. The logical drawback is the fact that losing the hard drive usually means losing everything you downloaded because ludicrous rules apply to paid downloads, then there's the lack of a tangible disc which can be played anywhere.

I don't entirely recommend the paid downloads except as a cool way to get a good quality taste of a show for a couple of bucks. I did that exact thing with about thirty different series, which I bought into about half of them, as in I went out and got their boxed sets. Good stuff.

And that leads into the other option, which I have to mention because it also needs mentioning. Just like bootlegs, This is NOT an option I'm recommending for a host of reasons.

Usually, these are assembled by pirate-hat-wearing nerds who have strange ideas about the ethical cost of an anime boxed set and put it up for free. The quality varies and unlike the paid downloads you'd have paid for, you spin the virus roulette wheel and run all sorts of fun risks from what otherwise seem like guys who are really generous with another dude's stuff. Additionally, there's the ethical point, which beyond the fact that you're stealing from the distributor there's the fact that you're helping to kill any reason for them to bother bringing them over from Japan in the first place.

While I wish things were always cheaper, prices for anime have never been more reasonable. VHS tapes were paid for in money you received after selling your organs on the black market, while DVD boxed sets of the same anime are selling for bus fare by comparison.

On the internet all bajillion episodes are up for free? Fuck you, Internet. Fuck you.

I don't disagree that some companies (animeigo, for instance) need to snap the fuck into reality about shit that is ancient, dusty and wasting away in their possession and price it accordingly in neat piles so they don't kill off interest of awesome titles, but it doesn't mean you should steal from that company.

Vote with your fucking wallets!

There's a reason people boycott things and since you literally ARE the market, you can define how things operate for your benefit.

This bleeds into the awkward part of online anime downloading that is usually always free and is what is know as a Labor of Love. Naturally, I'm talking about...


Fansubs

Fansubs are how anime REALLY got noticed, who wouldn't notice free anime? Usually fansubs were super accurate and had awesome subtitle features and language/cultural guides that helped us filthy Gaijin understand the situational context of the far east.

Before distributors oiled themselves up and jumped into the ring to fight over licenses, anime just sat around in dusty piles and clever minds brought over tapes from Japan and using magical equipment applied English Language subtitles to the Japanese language anime and gave away tapes usually for the cost of the shipping expenses and the blank tapes as well. This is how I watched a series called Mysterious Play or, as I knew it, "Fushigii Yuugi", as well as Voltage Fighter Gowkaizer, Tekkaman Blade 2, Virus Buster Serge, Tenchi Muyo and a bunch of other stuff.

It whets the appetite of the market, spreading free advertising by getting on-hand nerd reviews before there's a product to sell domestically. It builds on an existing market and for a long time was a bigger benefit than a burden to the domestic market.

That was then. Now we have other problems...

Just like the piracy of the domestic product, Fansubs are FREE and found in copious amounts on the internet since most anime fans usually get their fansubs online anyway. But the complications extend even further because with a tool like Youtube online it's a devastating thought as to how it could affect anyone foolish enough to distribute in any country, ever.

It benefits fans of Bleach and Naruto for instance because they can watch episodes in roughly the same week that they air in Japan complete with commando-efficient subtitles by heroic nerds graded by hazard levels instead of personalities and since copyright law is super flimsy on stuff that is broadcast... well, they go nuts!

It doesn't SEEM like it does any harm, but over time it WILL eat into the profits as they try to bring it into the country and since it's all floating in the air as opposed to being tangible copies of tapes or discs the downloads will be nigh available forever. So things get really awkward for the local distributor as the die-hard crowds will already have had their fill meaning less copies will sell.

The less copies that sell, the less domestic support that franchise will have. Which is why they approached the problem in this direction: Distributors tolerate fansubs up until the point their product is on the shelf, they do little to harass the fansubbers. The "plus" is that the domestic distributor has the original creator's stamp on the translation and usually gets the same approval for their English dub.

Uh... Well, the whole Fansub/piracy line is really one for the market to reach consensus on and the industry to out-do the competition. ADV Films had that down to an art with good dubs that were worth waiting for, cool extra features like pop-up cultural references and the jiggle counter and a lineup so reliable that they went from localizing for consumption to directly MAKING anime as well as dabbling in other side projects like the live action Evangelion film (now dead in the water) and Lady Death.

I'm dreadfully heading off topic now, but basically there's all kinds of avenues of anime collection in this day and age for anyone on any budget. Knowing me, I'll flesh out the options I've listed with better examples, but for now please leave thoughts and suggestions. I don't plan to mention the downloads or bootlegs and how to obtain them, again so not to spread ire or wrath in either direction.

Some people only seek help AFTER detonating islands... tsk, tsk.

So... AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Or maybe, GAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Stress makes us do things we regret. Like destroy Hong Kong. Oh and apparently rend people asunder in horrible scenes of vicious carnage.

Scream with me as we dissect a horrifyingly messy anime delight of mine, GenoCyber!

WARNING: NSFW! Horrifying scenes of violence follow, only click the jump if you're steeled for nightmarish visions of brutal violence and language.


RG Veda: Nipple Tassels are GO!

Still working on 6-10 of my top ten, but I figured I might as well add something for the laaaaaaaaaaaadies.

This one goes out to my sister, my anime comrade-in-arms during the tragically sensitive period of that I explored the animation of the heathen-filled far east.

When seeking out fire-wielding, effeminate characters accept no substitutes. Let's flutter about in ecstatic discussion of RG Veda.


Friday, August 13, 2010

Heroic Legend of Arislan: A Girl Who would be King. Wait, that's a dude?!

So in watching anime there's occasionally moments when a beautifully animated character walks on screen and a brief panning sequence is used to drink in the character's appearance and then one dumb bastard in the room might say something to the television screen, like "Hey baby, that crown looks heavy. Can I hold it up by your boobs?" or something equally idiotic.

For the record, I'm usually THAT bastard.

Pleasure to meet you.

And I should also note that at least 40% of the time in anime that "hot lady" is not a lady and so it was with my first taste of the Heroic Legend of Arislan.

Oops.

And here people wonder why I stopped drinking...


Thursday, August 12, 2010

It's not fair!


(Such is the appropriate reaction to sad and weird ass news like almost every anime company I supported since I was eleven years old tanking in Bankruptcy and pulling their stock from the market.)

Losing a friend is always hard, losing a friend in an industry is also hard. Watching a fledgling industry you're obsessed with fall into a downward spiral sucks. It sucks hard.

Starting sometime in 2008 (give or take), the market took a turn. "It's nothing," says the government. So the wheels began turning sending us into a nationwide depression that apparently is affecting the rest of the world.

Without wandering into the serious political screw-ups leading up to this problem and the insanely idiotic choices that followed from the new guy in charge... One of the early indicators for nerds that the shit was hitting the fan was when business began being eaten by other businesses. The point that the alarms went off was when multiple businesses began filing both Chapter 7 and Chapter 11 Bankruptcies.

So it was that the anime industry took a massive blow in the USA. Japanimation Giants ADV Films and CPM filed for Bankruptcy. With other teetering on the edge to this day.

What does this mean to you? Well, it means that your once overwhelming access to anime libraries have been significantly stunted.

Don't slit your wrists because potentially this can only mean the formation of something much better. But as of this moment, your stuff isn't readily available and it will probably be several years before these massive libraries of anime come back on the market domestically given all the madness with the licenses and potential bankruptcies of the original license holders in Japan.

SO basically, I'm whining.

I'm nostalgic for all the stuff from the early nineties and if I could make hot, sticky love to one institution of anime distribution it would have been ADV Films. They pushed the quality of DVD menus, audio quality, dub scripts, special features, etc. way past the bar set by all those OTHER guys. Also their library was magnificent.

I know it's weird, but ADV changed my entire attitude towards the art of the english dub and demonstrated that the only thing holding back other distributors was themselves and the effort they were willing to apply to the adaption and presentation. They made stuff I would normally avoid watching at all costs not merely BEARABLE, but enjoyable!

Uh, anyway, I'm gonna stop ranting a bit here. Reserving the right to come back and update this so it seems like a more... logical and reasonable post. Or maybe not. Maybe I'll just rant some more.

SLEEP IN FEAR!!!

Monday, August 9, 2010

Birdy the Mighty: Making High School awkward for everyone

Ever have one of those days where you wish you could be someone else?

And then that day comes and you find yourself gaping into a mirror wondering why you are wearing your sister's dress, wearing make-up and heels that don't fit and you're standing in a bus station men's bathroom in an unfamiliar city?

Uh, me either.

Anyway, let's talk about Birdy the Mighty, a personal favorite of mine, but I don't know about squeezing it into the top 10 since there isn't enough to satisfy my greedy anime hunger. So let's just consider this a brief break from the top 10 and go with a strong anime recommendation.


Sunday, August 8, 2010

Good Dub, Bad Dub: A Field Guide to audible fun you can understand

So anime has been bleeding over into the USA for since around the 60's. During the 80's so many shows were dubbed and renamed that companies are still trying to clean up the legal mess since so many fingers were in their pies.

One thing has only recently begun to truly change though: Dubs have MOSTLY gotten better, but bad ones will haunt us forever. Let's talk about the differences between good and bad. And then snarl a lot.



Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Excel Saga: To "Excel" is to invite a spray of mace in the eyes

Afro jokes, old anime references, random acts of violence, fast talking so fast that it actually hospitalizes voice actors and weird shit that is SO WEIRD that it puts all other weird shit to shame.

My number #5...

Let's press the issue that is Excel Saga!


Sunday, August 1, 2010

Ha ha, you SLAY me!

I'm a nerd.

I'm sorry, internet. I know you had a different image of me in your head, but I really am just a big ball of nerdness.

It's true! I can comfortably confess that I've never wielded a 20-sided die, but I have had relations with... role playing games of the videogame variety. As such, I've been drawn in my own share of the nerdy Tolkien-esque fantasy wandering, ragtag warrior tales popular in both eastern/western RPG games.

As such, it was without much struggle that I was pulled into the doofy D&D style world of Slayers...


Bubblegum Crash: Abandon all hope, your ship crashes here

I know I said I was taking a break from Bubblegum Crisis... I lied.

Apparently, I'm a liar.

Bubblegum Crisis has a finale of sorts that is received typically with booing and hissing,  when discussing the amazing OAV series of BGC it is important to give it some humility by noting the horror of it's unpleasant and barely canon-based conclusion. Naturally, I'm speaking of the infamous Bubblegum Crash!